Who Am I In Christ?

Identity in a Fragmented World

“I don’t know who I am anymore.”

I’ve heard this sentence countless times in the therapy room. It’s spoken through tears, whispered in moments of deep reflection, or offered in quiet despair. In a world obsessed with self-definition by career, appearance, performance, or social approval, many feel untethered and unsure.

As a Christian psychologist, I often see the deep emotional toll that identity confusion can take. The good news is that God offers us a way back—a secure, unshakeable identity not rooted in what we do or how we feel, but in who we are in Christ.

The Identity Struggle

From a clinical lens, identity confusion is often linked to emotional pain, trauma, or chronic invalidation. When someone grows up hearing they’re not good enough, or when they’ve been hurt repeatedly, the mind begins to internalise lies: “I am broken. I am worthless. I don’t matter.”

In psychological terms, we might call this the formation of the false self—an identity constructed as a defence mechanism to survive pain or rejection. This false self might become a perfectionist, a people-pleaser, or an overachiever, constantly performing for worth that never feels secure.

But underneath the coping is a deep longing to be seen, loved, and accepted—not for what we do, but for who we are.

Who God Says You Are

Scripture speaks directly to this ache, offering a powerful alternative to performance-based identity. God’s Word redefines our worth—not based on our success, pain, or past—but on His grace and love.

Here’s what the Bible says about who you are in Christ:

• You are chosen.
  “You did not choose me, but I chose you.” – John 15:16

• You are deeply loved.
  “Nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus.” – Romans 8:39

• You are redeemed.
  “In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins.” – Ephesians 1:7

• You are a new creation.
  “If anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” – 2 Corinthians 5:17

• You are God’s masterpiece.
  “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works.” – Ephesians 2:10

These are not just comforting words. They are identity anchors—truths strong enough to withstand the storms of life and the lies of shame.

Healing the False Self

In therapy, we explore the roots of our identity struggles—what lies have shaped us, what trauma has distorted our self-perception, and how we’ve coped along the way. But Christian psychology doesn’t stop there. It also invites the transformative power of truth.

Romans 12:2 urges us to “be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” This involves challenging the lies of the false self and allowing the truth of God’s Word to take root in our thought patterns, our nervous systems, and our relational habits.

This journey may include:

• Cognitive reframing – replacing negative core beliefs with identity-affirming truth.

• Inner child work – nurturing parts of ourselves that carry wounds of rejection or fear.

• Forgiveness and grief – releasing pain and shame from the past to receive healing in the present.

When clients begin to internalise their God-given identity, the shift is powerful. Self-worth no longer rises and falls with external outcomes. Instead, it is grounded in being fully known and fully loved by Christ.

Practising Your Identity in Christ

Living from your true identity in Christ is a daily process—one that can be strengthened through small, intentional habits:

• Scripture Meditation:
  Read and reflect on verses that speak directly to your identity. Try Ephesians 1 or Psalm 139.

• Identity Affirmations:
  Speak biblical truths aloud each morning:
  “I am loved.” “I am chosen.” “I am free in Christ.”

• Journaling Prompts:

  • What lies have I believed about myself?

  • What does God say about me instead?

• Therapy and Discipleship:
  Healing identity wounds often requires both inner work and spiritual growth. A Christian psychologist can help you process emotions while remaining anchored in your faith.

• Worship and Prayer:
  Let worship be a reminder of who you are and whose you are.

A Christian Psychologist’s Reflection

One client I worked with was paralysed by shame. He had carried deep childhood wounds, believing he was unworthy of love and belonging. In therapy, we began to unravel these beliefs while anchoring him in Scripture. Slowly, he began to see himself through a different lens—not as broken, but as redeemed. Not as forgotten, but as known. His language shifted from “I’ll never be good enough” to “I am a new creation in Christ.” That transformation didn’t happen overnight, but it changed his life.